Insanity Thy name is Michelangelo
by yaoigirl22
Summary: Hi, my name is um, uh….I don’t remember but I know I had one before, at least I think I had one before, I think I lost it like I did my mind.
1. Walking with Insanity

**Discialmer: I do not own TMNT **

**Warnings: None that I feel that need to be mentioned.**

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**Insanity Thy name is Michelangelo **

Hi, my name is um, uh….I don't remember but I know I had one before, at least I think I had one before, I think I lost it like I did my mind, I've been trying to find it. I've been here a long time so it's around here somewhere. Hey it's Shiny Bucket Head! He looks mad….I wonder why he so spiky, I bet he always hurts himself when he tries to scratch…I bet that's why he so cranky! He itchy and can't get it so he gets grumpy Yea! I solved the mystery go me!

Wait Stupid Shiny Bucket Head was talking and now he leaving, hey come back here! Hey!.... don't leave me here… alone….I don't like being alone cause then the ghosts come out of hiding and they're not nice, not like the voices. The voices are really fun, they come out anytime they want, and we have fun talks too. Yesterday we talked about how Shiny Bucket Head keeps himself so shiny.

It's always nighttime in here, never daytime. I've seen daytime before at least I think I did, I don't remember lots. Especially when I get mad, when I get mad I go to sleep then when I wake up my heads hurts and I'm covered in red stuff, Shiny Bucket Head is really really mad , he yells a lot when his mad. I don't like it when he yells, I tell him I'm sorry cause I'm really am. I can't help it when I get mad, those meanie shadow peoples and scientist always hurt me really bad, I ask them to stop they don't, so rude.

The ghosts are here! They don't talk they just sit and glare at me, sometimes they point at stuff. I wonder what's it like to be a ghost, it looks boring… hey its Steve! He one of the shadow peoples here, I call him Steve cause it's a cool name like Mark or John. He's opening the door, I don't move cause I'm chained to the wall, "Let's go freak" he says anyone knows what freaks means?

**It means abnormal**

Hey the voices are back!

**Did that reject just call you a freak!? Kick his ass!**

**Hee he said 'ass' **

**Must you always resort to violence?**

He unchains me and pulls at my leash, I wave bye-bye to the ghosts as we leave.

******************************

As we go through the halls I hum a tune while listening to the voices, its familiar and I'm sure I heard it somewhere maybe when I find my mind I'll remember, maybe I should ask the voices they know everything, but before I can ask I'm shoved into the bad room. The bad room is where the scientist hurt me a lot, I don't like this room, nope not one bit. The voices are suddenly gone and I feel alone, they tied me down onto the table its cold, I frown before turning my head to Steve who was leaving "Bye-bye Steve!" I said happily, Steve and the scientists shake their heads.

Then I feel something stick in my arm, minutes later my body starts burning, I whimper but don't scream, I think I forgot how to do that too. Suddenly my body starts to burn from the inside, this was new and it hurt! "Stop" I whimpered to the scientist, more pain, growing and growing. Stop, stop, STOP! STOP! STOP!

***********************

I groaned as I opened my eyes, my head hurts. I sit up and look around I'm not in the bad room anymore, shadow people were on the floor around me sleeping and I'm covered in red stuff again, uh oh I slowly turn my head and there is Shiny Bucket Head, who was standing there breathing really hard and his eyes are glowing, I'm in trouble. Shiny Bucket Head then pointed at me as he said to one of his shadow peoples "Kill this **thing**" he says "I never what to see it again" two shadow people grabbed me and drag me away, Shiny Bucket Head gonna kill me...I wonder if will hurt.

**********************

Four years ago, they were four, four years ago they were a family, four years ago there was Michelangelo. Four years ago they lost their baby brother to the Shedder, kidnapped and never seen from again. They searched and searched, and are still searching to this day, hoping to find their missing family member. Hearts heavy from the burden off failing to protect the one they always promise to watch, to be sure no harm befallen him…they miss him so much.

The lair was not even a home any longer, no video games blasting form the T.V., no more pranks or jokes, no more sweet smelling aroma floating from the kitchens. No more bothering them to come play, no more bright blue puppy eyes begging, no more laughter no more smiles…just no more.

Don didn't even blink when the sound of footsteps echoed through the lair, he knew it was Raph coming back from either a night of drinking with Casey or looking ….for Mikey, the purple wearing turtle paused in his work at the thought of his little brother, it was nearly going on five years now…five lonely and quiet years. A loud crash and shouting, made him jump before sighing.

"They're at it again" he mumbled bitterly. After the death of Master Splinter two years ago things have gotten from bad to worse between Leo and Raph, to the point that blood had been drawn on many occasions. The sound of a door slamming told him that Raph was in his room now.

"Come in" he said minutes later when there was a knock on his door, the door opened and Leo entered the lab with a bruise on his shoulder "I thought I told you to go to bed" the elder said, Don gave a small smile "You did but I can't sleep" Leo sighed not in the mood to deal with another stubborn brother tonight. "Fine but don't blame me when you can't get out of bed tomorrow" Don was not surprised that the elder gave in so quickly; Leo was just too tired to deal with anything lately. "Night" Leo then said "Night" Donnie said as his door slide closed.

He listened as feet faded away before resuming his work

_Hey Donnie!_

Don looked up and whirled around, Mikey stood there a big grin on his face "Mikey?"

_Whatcha doin?_

_Hey Don can you fix this for me?_

_Thanks Donnie you're the best!_

Don rubbed his eyes and Mikey was gone. Donnie stared at the spot where he brother once stood before turning back around and resuming his work, eyes clouding with salty tears.

Raph slammed his door shut as he entered his room, grabbing the nearest thing he threw it against the wall, before sliding down to the floor, "Shit" he muttered, he hadn't met to blow up in Leo's face at least not like that. He knew that his brother meant well, but it's just been so hard without Mikey. He couldn't stand the silence, couldn't stand being in the lair that remained him so much of his baby brother.

_Hey Raph come play video games with me! _

_Haha to slow Raphie!_

_Raph can I sleep here with you, I had another nightmare._

"Mikey"

Worst of all he couldn't stand the tears that fell.

Leo closed the door to his room, meditation candles still lit and in place from where he left them when he heard Raph come back, with a sigh –something he was doing a lot of in the past four years- he resumed his attempt at mediating.

_Leo! Leo! _

He had to clear his mind, to be calm

_Hey Leo come play with me!_

He was calm

_You know sometimes you just need to relax bro_

He was the picture of clam, even if his shoulders and tears were not.

**********************

Four years ago, they were four, four years ago they were a family, four years ago there was Michelangelo.

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**Well here a new TMNT story. Hope you like it,**

**You know what to do**

**Review Please!!  
**

**Bye-bye! ^^**


	2. Hello My Lost Insanity

**Discailmer: I do not own TMNT**

**Warnings : None so far **

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****Insanity Thy name is Michelangelo**

He sat there, body covered in blood that was flooded everywhere, bodies surrounded him but he paid them no mind, curious eyes looked around him wondering if this was what death was like and if it was it was boring, he was considering getting up to play when a sound made him look behind him. It wasn't a shadow person nor was it one of the ghosts, it was a man with a hockey mask and he seemed shock at seeing him, he tilted his head and stared with interest at the man who seemed frozen at the spot.

The thought made him giggle, the sound echoed through the warehouse causing him to look for the source and the man to jump. Not founding the source he turned back to the man who now was in front of him kneeling, the man didn't seem to care that he was kneeling in a pool of blood hockey mask was gone.

"Mikey" he said, he sounded relieved and very happy, he also looked like he was about to cry.

He tilted his head to the side at the unfamiliar name "Who Mikey?" he asked, the man gasped. The two then stared at each other one curiously and the other in shock, finally the man moved he stood up and took out a phone. He watched as the man spoke, before becoming bored and looking around once more, they were in a warehouse. He knew this because the voices told him so, windows were broken, the roof look like it could cave in any second. "Mikey" he looked back at the man, "Are you death?" he asked, the man looked confused and partly horrified, "What?" the man said.

"The voices say you're death, are you?" the man looked completely sick now "No" he then said "Oh" silence then "Am I a dead?" "No" "Oh" then more silence, the man stood there looking uncomfortable while he poked at a nearby body. "Wake up" he said pouting when the body didn't move, the man paled and muttered something. "He won't wake up" he told the man.

The man's phone ranged, the sound echoing and once more had him looking around for the source, the man frowned when he giggled. After the man talked he looked at him, he hesitated before holding out his hand "Come on" he said, he looked at his hand presented to him, before sniffing it when he didn't smell any food he looked at the man, "Come on April's waitin for us" it looked like the man was going to grab him if he didn't move. He tugged on his collar then his chain.

**He wants you to come with him**

**He doesn't knew that he needs to take the chain**

**Show him**

He placed the chain in the man's waiting hand, the man gasp before shakingly closing his hand around it, Mikey smiled.

**************************

Three shadowed figures landed silently on the fire escape, one by one they entered the house through the open window, the living room was empty saw for the sleeping figure on the sofa, a familiar figure.

Raph couldn't take his eyes off the shape on the sofa, he knew that shape very well and prayed that it was not another hallucination. Judging from his brother's faces they too were hoping the same thing, it was Leo who moved, his feet going on their own to the furniture, they stopped at the front his hand moved, vaguely was he aware of his younger brothers behind him looking over his shoulder. His hand moved down hesitating just for a moment before pulling back the cover.

Don's heart stopped and his eyes widen, "M-Mikey" he said softly and slowly kneeled, he caressed the cheek of his sleeping baby brother, it was cold yet so warm...so real. Tears stinging his eyes but not from sorrow but from happiness, he brother his baby brother was hear.

Really here, alive on April's sofa sleeping soundly "Mikey" his voice hoarse as he hugged his brother the tears falling freely, he felt his brothers joining him their tears joining his.

Unnoticed by the three brothers, Casey and April watched the reunion a bitter smile on both their lips, they knew that soon Mikey was going to wake and that the three turtles were going to see the damage that was done to their family. They just hoped they would be able to fix it.

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**Here Chapter 2, sorry its short.**

**Review Plzz! **

**Bye-bye! ^^**


	3. Insanity Thy name Is

**Discailmer : I do not own TMNT, what a sad world we live in.**

**Warnings: None that I know of **

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**Insanity Thy name is Michelangelo**

Raph stared at his sleeping brother who slept peacefully in his bed, they had moved their brother later that evening back to the lair and into his room. Casey and April telling them to call them when Mikey woke, Casey had told them that when he woke Mikey would not be the same, when asked why and how Casey didn't answer. Now he sat here refusing to move, afraid that if he left Mikey would be gone.

*****************

He woke up a day later, blue eyes stared up at the ceiling, loud snoring caused him to look, a turtle with a red bandana sat on the chair arms crossed his head drooping. His eyes lit up "I know him!" he thought frowning when he couldn't up with a name. Sitting up he moved close as possibly to the sleeping turtle.

**He sounds like a chainsaw **

**He sleeping **

**Maybe if we wake him he'll play with us.**

He smiled at the idea and poked at the turtle's beak , the turtle jerked awake blinking at the smiling face "M-M-Mikey?" he tilted his head with a frown, there was that name again. "Y-you're awake! How are you feeling, no wait let me get Donnie" He watched the turtle scramble out the room tripping over toys.

**Guess he didn't want to play. **

**How rude, running out like that.**

He wanted to follow but couldn't at least not without someone leading him by his chain, footsteps pounded against the ground before another turtle came in this one was wearing a purple bandana, he knew this one too!

**I think his name is Bob **

**Bob?**

**Who names a turtle Bob**

**I do!**

He frowned that name didn't sound right, "Mikey" that name again, "Who Mikey?" the turtle gasp softly his brown eyes looking socked. "You're Mikey, that's you're name" "I'm Mikey?" the turtle nodded with a questioning, curious and hopeful gaze. His name was Mikey…it sounded right yet something was still wrong.

**Well it's better than Super Turtle 3.0**

**Who came up with that name anyway?**

**If he knows your name then maybe he has you're mind too!**

He looked at the turtle "Do you have my mind?" he asked, "What?" " You know my name , than you have my mind" it look like it took the turtle awhile to figure out what he just said, when it seemed like he did he didn't say a word for a moment, "No" the turtle then said "Oh" then a thought came to him " Am I dead?" "NO!" he jumped, "Sorry" the turtle quickly said he wasn't sure he then watched as the turtle dug into his bag he brought in with him, his eyes widen when he saw the item.

He didn't know what it was called but he knew that when the scientist used this item pain quickly followed, the turtle must have noticed his tense posture and how his eyes remained glued to the item in his hand, because he quickly dropped it. "Mikey" he said "Mikey look at me" blue looked into chocolate brown "I'd never hurt you _ever_" he said and gently pulled him into a hug.

……

.......

........

**...this feels nice**

He nodded, he felt warm and safe, not cold like he usual did. The two looked up when they heard a noise coming from the door way, another turtle stood there this one wearing a blue bandana.

**We know him! We know him! We know him! **

The purple wearing turtle released him and pulled the blue wearing turtle out the room and into the hall leaving him alone. He let his eyes roam over the room, it felt familiar to him, toys and comic books were littered everywhere, reaching down he took hold of a stuffed panda bear, he stared at it.

**CUUTTEEE!**

He pulled it close to him and inhaled the scent that seem so familiar and comforting, he didn't know where he was and he wasn't convinced that he wasn't dead, but he knew one thing thought not certain, his name was Mikey.

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**Well here Chapter 3**

**You know what to do, tell me what you think**

**Review Plzz**

**Bye-bye! ^^**


	4. Failing My Insanity

**Discailmer: I do not own TMNT**

**WARNING: Just one word, so nothing really. **

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**Insanity Thy name is Michelangelo**

Raphael wanted to tune out the voice that talked to air, he wanted to ignore the nagging voice in his head telling him it was his fault, he wanted to but couldn't, because it was his fault. If only he gone with his brother, if only hadn't been so suborn that night, if only if only, if only!

Mikey who was on the floor talking aloud to the voices stopped and looked up at Raph who had growled angrily, "Raph" he said the name the way it was said. Empty, no familiarity, no recognition, it hurt him, broke him. Raph took a deep breath and looked at his younger sibling who stared down up at him with pure curiosity the old panda bear he had given when they were four Mikey was clinched tightly to his chest, it almost could be described as a picture of innocence to an outsider.

"Its nothing" he said, Mikey went back to talking.

From the recliner chair that once belong to their sensei when he was among the living, sat Leo who watched with a troubled and disturbed frown, he couldn't even begin to describe the emotions he felt. To describe the thoughts that just seemed to run over him, feeling like a train at full speed hitting him over and over again. Leo winced when Mikey giggled, he was beginning to hate that sound. At one point that sound had been many things, joyous mischievous, playful, insanity wasn't one of them, never should have been, but it was now.

"My fault" he thought, all of this was his fault.

He was suppose to protect the family, he was the elder brother, the leader, he trained and trained to make sure no harm befall his brothers to make sure they were safe, but he failed. As a brother, as a leader, as everything.

**He looks sad**

**Or he could have gas**

**You're an idiot**

**Hehehe**

Mikey stared at the elder turtle who stared back with a sad broken expression, he wondered why the turtle was looking like that and in the back of his mind he didn't like it.

**….**

**….**

**….**

In his lab Donnie sat in his chair, books surrounded him, every last one of them were a key, a key to bringing back their brother at least he hoped. "I have to fix this" were his continuing thoughts, he had to. If only he had just taken a few moments of his time to pay attention to Mikey to listen to him, then he wouldn't have gotten captured and wouldn't be that ….person disguised as his brother. "I have to fix this".

*******************

The deadly silence that now painted the lair was such a norm now, that many times it frighten her, an eerie silence that sent chills down her spine.

"Hey April" Leo greeted her on his way to the kitchen to fix Mikey some lunch, Mikey was behind him being led by the chain hooked to his collar. April gave a puzzled and disapproving look, she had thought that Don was able to get the collar off "We can't get it off" Leo explained when he saw the look "Don says it's embedded in his skin and he won't move with out it".

**We know her!**

**What's her name again?  
April**

"A-April?" both April and Leo looked at the turtle, who stared at the human with interest.

**Why isn't she a turtle?  
Maybe she deformed.**

**Or maybe she undercover and disguise as a human**

Mikey giggled causing Leo to frown and April to raise a brow, suddenly Mikey stiffen slightly and he eyes glued themselves at a spot over Leo's shoulder. "Mikey?" the ghosts glared heatedly at him, usual this didn't frighten him and sometimes he even talked to them but now for some reason the now terrified him, Mikey tighten the hold on his bear and his eyes flashed in fear.

**What's the hell is they're problem**

**They look mad**

**Scary too**

**They're always mad and scary **

"Mikey?" Leo said loudly while April went to get Don, when he didn't get a response he placed a hand on his brother's arm causing the younger on to jump, he turned his frighten eyes to Leo's , "What's wrong?" he asked as April and Don came towards them "What happen?" Don asked "I don't know, me and April were talking, then Mikey spoke and then he suddenly froze up and now he like this" Don examined the turtle with a critical eye and notice how Mikey's eyes moved form Leo to a spot over the elder's shoulder.

"He sees something" he said "Over you're shoulder Leo" both Leo and April looked but saw nothing "I don't see anything" April said, Don gently then took hold of Mikey's face and made Mikey look at him "What do you see?"

**Don't tell him!**

**Tell him!**

**You can't! Not this!**

**Tell him!**

**SHUT UP!**

Don saw something flash through those then Mikey spoke "Ghosts"

**NO!**

Don blinked that wasn't what he was expecting but he suppose it was a start "What kind of ghosts?" he asked.

**No!**

**Don't tell him! **

**Tell him **

**Didn't we tell you to shut up!**

"Scary ghosts" Don sighed, knowing that he wasn't going to get any more acute answers if he continued asking.

One of the ghosts moved, Mikey jumped back, they've never done that before. Another ghost moved this one closer, Mikey moved back more, when a third ghost moved even closer to him Mikey glued himself to Don.

Don grunted when Mikey tighten his hold around him burying his face in his neck, his skinny frame trembling. Alarm went off in Don's head, "I'll take him to the lab" he said to an extremely worried Leo and April "I have to change some of his bandages" Leo nodded, handed him the leash then took April to the kitchen.

"Come on Mikey" he said tugging the leash gently "Lets go to the lab" Mikey peeked at the ghosts who seemed to have disappeared, timidly he looked around no ghosts, he then looked at don who was smiling at him gently. He…..he knew that gentle smile.

…**stupid ghosts **

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Leo entered the lab with lunch just as Don finished bandaging Mikey. All three still remembered that night, remember the skeletal frame, the cuts bruise burns that seemed tattooed into their baby brother's skin. He looked so small and weak, so vulnerable. Mikey giggled when Don ran his hand over a scar on his plastron, it would never go away. "I brought soup" Leo said, Dan gave an approving nod.

**Food!**

Mikey still was not ready to eat solid foods. When give the bowl Mikey stuck his hand in it, not caring for the temperature, scooped it up and eat form his hands. Don and Leo just watched sadly.

After lunch Leo left the two and went to check on his other brother who had disappeared before lunch anger and sorrow in his eyes. "Raph" he knocked on the door "Go the fuck away" came the reply, although the words were meant to chase him away the voice was weak almost broken. Nothing like the strong and brave Raph they were use to.

"Raph come out" "Leave me alone" "Its gonna be okay Raph" Leo said softly, "Don gonna help him and we'll have our Mikey back" no answer Leo was being to think to ignoring him then, "How can you be so sure, how do you know everything gonna be okay?" "I don't" he answered honestly "but I do know that Mikey needs us and if we're there for him everything will fall into place".

He wasn't thoroughly convinced of the last part and he was sure that Raph wasn't either but he wanted to hope even if he was a failer.

The door opened, Leo didn't comment on how red and wet Raph's eyes were, and although the two didn't say anything else to each other as they mad their way to the Lab where Don and Mikey were, words were spoken that said so much.

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**There you go Chapter 4 **

**Looks like there something going on between the ghosts and the voices, wonder what.**

**Anyway you know what to do.**

**Review Plzz!**

**Bye-bye! ^^**


	5. Hearing Insanity

**Disclaimer: I do not own TMNT **

**Warnings: A lot of curssing in this one. **

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****Insanity Thy name is Michelangelo**

The voices were fighting a lot lately, always three against one.

**YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE ENCOURAGED HIM!**

**IT'S ALL YOU'RE FAULT! **

**WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST KEEP QUIET!  
SHUT UP! **

Raph looked up from the magazine he was reading when he heard a whimpering noise coming from Mikey. Leo and Donnie were at April's, the red head had called early telling them that she may have found a way to help Mikey, and since Mikey refused to leave his room for fear of the ghosts, Raph decided to stay with him, promising to call if anything happens.

**WILL YOU TWO SHUT THE FUCK UP!**

**MAKE ME!  
**

"Mikey what's wrong?" Raph moved over to the other turtle that had his hands covered over his ears "L-loud" he whimpered, "Loud?"

**YOU'RE SUCH A DICK!**

**AND YOU'RE A LITTLE BITCH!**

Mikey whimpered again "Stop" Raph was now calling Leo "Stop", they grew louder. He felt like head was going to explode. "Stop it! Stop it!"

**THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!**

"STOP IT!"

……

……

……**  
**

Raph hung up the phone and gathered his shaking brother in his arms, he rocked him back and froth drawing comforting circles on his shell, Mikey clung to him. Eyes closed shut small whimpering sounds escaping his lips, this was how Leo and Don found them.

*******************

"From what April and I have gathered, Mikey's memories are repressed. His mind locked them away" Don explained later that evening when Mikey had finally fallen asleep, "So its not permanent amnesia" Leo said "No" that was a relief to all of them. "But what bout the ghosts he keeps hearin and the voices?" Raph asked still a little shaken at what he saw earlier. "I'm not sure, it could be that his mind has made it up or...he could actual be hearing voices and seeing ghosts", that didn't help on bit. "So what do we do now?" Leo asked "Go about things normally, do things we would do when Mikey was...well Mikey. It should bring back some memories"

*************

Raph left the lab to check on his brother, the door was cracked. Raph pushed it open, it was dark but Raph could make out his brother on the bed, the bear in his arms staring fearfully at something across the room, Raph instantly knew what it was. Quickly he closed the distance between him and his brother, he sat on the bed "Mike" he called Mikey jumped and looked frightfully at him. "T-the ghosts" he said, Raph nodded and made sure to stay in the turtle's vision "The voices don't like them" Raph didn't sat anything "T-their loud, I-I'm scared" Mikey then whimpered.

The younger turtle then found himself once again in a strong embrace, "Its okay" Raph said softly to him "Nothin gonna hurt you, I promise". Promise, why did that word mean so much to him, why did it make him feel safe,

"_Raphie I'm scared"_

"_What's wrong?"  
_

_"Monster"  
_

_"Monster?"  
_

_"Uh-huh, they wanna eat me" _

"_You wanna sleep with me?" _

"_Please"_

"_Come on" _

"_But what if the monster comes in here?" _

"_Then I'll beat them up, no monster gonna hurt you while I'm around"  
_

_"Promise?" _

"_Promise"_

"_But what of you go potty?" _

"_Then I'll leave Mr. Bear"_

Mr. Bear, Mikey looked at down at the bear in his arms then at Raph. The ghosts and voices completely forgotten, he held out the bear towards the older turtle. Raph stared at it befuddled "Your Mr. Bear" Raph stared shocked and surprised, Mikey tilted his head when Raph didn't take the bear "Your Mr. Bear" he said again. "No Mike" Raph finally said with a gentle smile, it was a smile Mikey felt was only for him. "Your Mr. Bear".

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**Well here you go two more Chapters after this then the squel....maybe.**

**You know what to do **

**Review Please!**

**Bye-bye! ^^**


	6. Where is Insanity?

**Discalmer: I do not own TMNT....which is proably a good thing for Mikey ^^**

**Warnings: None in this one **

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**Insanity Thy Name Is Michelangelo **

Something was missing, he wasn't sure what. He been at this place for three months now, he belonged here, where? He wasn't sure but he did know he would know soon just like he remembered Mr. Bear. Besides he liked it here, though the voices didn't but he ignored them, Raph Leo and Don were really nice to him sometimes he saw them looking at him with sad expressions but other then that everything was good or so he thought.

Leo looked up from making his tea as his younger brother entered the kitchen, a few weeks ago he had convinced Mikey that he didn't need the chain to move around , all three of them were happy about the change now thay needed to get the collar off . He watched Mikey look around the kitchen with a lost expression on his face, "Mikey" he said the turtle looked at him "You want something?" Mikey looked around some more picking at Mr. Bear's fur "I don't know" he said and left for Donnie's lab, leaving a bewildered Leo.

Don looked up from the toaster he was fixing, Raph had destroyed it again. He watched Mikey walk around his lab, looking never touching "Are you looking for something?" Don asked Mikey looked him blue eyes lost "I don't know" he said and left. Don raised a eye ridge.

Raph raised a brow when Mikey once again stood in front of the TV. Only this time he didn't move he stood there looking lost, "Oi Knucklehead" Raph had started calling him that a month ago it seemed that Mikey didn't mind and sometimes he smiled at the name. "What's wrong?" Raph asked and Mikey answered Raph like he did Leo and Don "I don't know".

*************

"What do you make of it Donnie" Leo asked after two weeks of Mikey's even more strange behavior, him and Don were doing the dishes "Not a clue, maybe Mikey remembering something and just can't seem to place where the memory belongs, and if that's the case then the best we can do is let him search until he can find what ever he looking for".

Mikey sat in the middle of the dojo Raph not far twirling one of his sais waiting with surprising patients for Mikey.

**What are you looking for?  
We can help. **

Mikey shook his head ignoring them Donnie had said that the voices were bad, that they weren't real.

**We are real!**

**And good too!**

Mikey shook his head again "Not real, not real, not real" he chanted.

**Fine**

Silence, Mikey frowned wondering if they went away forever but then

**Are you afraid of me? **

Mikey blinked, this voice wasn't mean as the other three, nor did it have a discomforting presence that the other three brought lately. "No" he said not seeing Raph frowned, more silence then

**What's wrong?**

"Something missing" he answered.

**Something...or someone **

Mikey's eyes narrowed, as he tried to picture what that missing feeling looked like, everything was a blur. "I don't know" he said.

**************

This room was different from the others

**We have to be quiet, we don't want to wake everyone.**

Mikey nodded, it was past his bed time. He looked around objects and pictures decorated selves and walls, one picture caught his attention, it was him! Him, Leo, Raph Donnie and... this other person. He wasn't a turtle like the others he had wise eyes and a kind smile, a demanding presence seem to surround him.

**Master **

"No" he said "Not right" that wasn't the right name for this person

**Sensei **

That wasn't it either, it was something else. This name carried respect and love, a name he grew with, a name he honored. "Mike" came the tired voice of Don "Donnie" Mikey said "Where father?"

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**Wow two chapters in one day! Almost done with this story. The last chapter was my favorite one, it made me go 'awww' right in the middle of class. **

**Everyone looked at me like I was carzy....which I'm not!...maybe a little.....okay a LOT! **

**Well you knew what to do tell me what you think, especially this one.**

**Revie plzz!**

**Bye-bye! ^^**


	7. Remembering Insanity

**Disclaimer: I do not own TMNT **

**Warnings: None really**

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The two stared at each other, one in shock the other in pure curiosity. "Where father?" Mikey asked again, Don didn't say anything he couldn't he was shocked. Mikey remembered Master Splinter! He was happy that his brother was remembering he really was, but how to tell him. How to tell you're mentally unstable brother that their father was gone. "Donnie?" the turtle sighed "Let's go to bed" he then said Mikey blinked "Father?" "In the morning, now come on its late" Mikey frowned but followed him to his room, after tucking his brother in Don went to his lab no longer tired.

The next morning Mikey and Raph came down for breakfast Mr. Bear in his arms ( he was attached to the thing, Don said it was a kind of comfort for him, and that made Raph feel all warm inside. Just don't let him here you say that aloud) Don and Leo were already waiting. Don had told the others about last night earlier this morning and after much hesitation (Don) and argument (Leo and Raph) they agreed that if Mikey asked again they would tell him the truth, surprisingly Mikey didn't say a word as he sat down for breakfast ( they finally convinced him to use the utensils) or all day.

It was when they were watching a movie that Mikey asked "Leo" he said. Said turtle looked at him "Yea Mike?" "Where Father?" the movie was the only thing that made a sound, "He gone" Don said after minutes ticked by "Gone where?"

**Where he'd go?**

"He died" Leo said Mikey's brow furrowed in confusion, father was gone?

**NO! THEY LIE!**

"No he's not dead" Mikey said "Its true Mikey" Leo said. "No! I saw him! I saw him!" this was what Don was worried about, Mikey was confused. His mind was right now stuck in a different time frame and them telling that Master Splinter died just confused him more, "Mikey calm down!"

**LIARS! **

"LIARS! LIARS! LIARS! LIARS!" father wasn't gone, he saw him, and he was alive. He remembered it clearly, Father was in that chair where Leo was sitting in minutes ago drinking his green tea and watching his stories, "No, not true, not true!" then Mikey did something he thought he forgot when he lost his mind, he cried, in Leo's arms.

***********

"This was what I was worried about" after they were able to clam Mikey down, the younger turtle had gone to his room, "His memoires, are so jumbled that his mind is stuck in a different time frame" Don said "but don't worry" he then quickly added at his two brothers alarmed expressions "Once his memories settle he'll be fine" _I hope_.

In his room Mikey sat on his floor thinking.

**THEY LIE, FATHER ALIVE!**

Mikey wasn't so sure "They've never lied before" he said "have they?".

…**No**

In fact he wondered what were Leo, Don and Raph to him. If Master Splinter was his father and theirs that would make them his brothers right?

**If they are our brothers then why did they leave us alone?**

Why? Why did they leave him alone with meanie Shiny Bucket head? Why didn't they come for him?

**Didn't they want us?**

They did want him or else they wouldn't be here caring for him now.

**But they didn't come. **

They didn't, for a long time.

**Why did they leave us?**

Mikey whimpered as his head throbbed with pain and feelings coursed through him, confusion, sorrow and something he hadn't felt in a long time **_anger_.**

A loud crash from the youngest's room had Donnie dropping the still broken toaster, startling Leo out of his meditation and Raph charging upstairs.

********

Raph swung the door the door opening ducking as an action figure came hurdling towards him, "Mike?" Mikey through another action figure, it hitting the wall breaking into parts, Raph stared in shock at the room for a moment. Papers that he knew came from his brother's sketch books and comics were littered all over the floor torn and into pieces, toys broken. The desk that was in the corner was now turned over and the bed's mattress was flipped, it looked like a tornado had been through here twice!

When Mikey picked up another action figure to throw it, Raph moved grabbing his brother's arm "Mikey stop it!" Mike growled and pulled away, he tripped over a broken remote controller sending the two falling to the floor, they continued to struggle until finally Mikey tiered out and laid underneath the bigger turtle, both panting.

"Why?" he asked after catching his breath Raph looked down at him "Why what?" he asked "Why did you leave me alone?" and when he was met with silence Mikey for the second time cried.

*********

Master Splinter always said "Leader first brother second" and he always followed that saying, always being leader before brother, and now he wondered if it was the right thing. After all it was a leader's decision that made him so strict that night, it was a leader's decision that made his brother run off, and the more he thought about it the more he was beginning to think that it was a leader's decision that caused his brother so much pain.

Whenever one of his brothers had a problem they came to him to solve or fix after all he was the genius of the family, so why couldn't he fix this? Why couldn't he find the solution? He was known to spend hours after hours even days on a problem or a project closing himself off from his family, from the world and if bothered sometimes he'll snap at the person….he snapped at him, pushed him away.

He hadn't meant to, and felt bad afterwards. Worried, when his brother didn't come home, cold when they found nothing but an orange mask sprinkles of blood and broken nunchucks, emptiness and hopelessness when all his searches turned up dead. Now that he had his brother back he still couldn't fix this. He loved his brother more than anything in the world, do anything to protect him and he failed in that, some genius he was.

He was always told that his temper would get the best of him and on several occasions it has, but now as he sat here in his room his brother asleep curled up next to him exhausted from crying, and his thoughts relaying that night. He knew that time had been the worse. He was upset that night, why? He couldn't really remember but he was always mad at something it seems, he remembered his brother smiling as he bounced over to him after Don had shooed him out of the lab.

He remembered feeling slightly amused at his brother's attempts to snatch the remote from him and then annoyances and then anger. He remembered not caring as his brother left the lair eyes darken with sadness and hurt, and that was the last time he saw his brother for nearly five years.

Now like always he wished he could go back and correct his mistake but knew it was to late, and now he was paying for his crime "I'm such a asshole" he mumbled to the dark room and bitter smile dancing on his lips.

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**There you go Chapter 7, tell me what you think honestly especailly this chapter because this one was hard for me to write, I redid it at least ten times before I was happy with it. I think I may have made Leo, Raph and Don OOC in the last part with thier thoughts. **

**One more chapter to go then THE END!**

**Review Plzz ! **

**Bye-bye!^^**


	8. Healing Insanity

**DISCLAIMER : I DO NOT OWN TMNT **

**Warnings: None **

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Michelangelo had locked himself in Raph's room, refusing to come out no matter how hard they tried, his tears echoing in the dark lair at night. All Leo, Don, and Raph could do was listen desperately wanting to comfort but couldn't, not because the younger turtle had locked the door it was because their presence seemed to frighten him. Leo remembered the look of fear in his little's brother's eyes when the turtle had entered Raph's room to check on him, it had hurt the elder turtle deeply never before had Mikey looked at with fear as though he was some monster, after that Mikey had locked the door and refused to come out. Leaving Raph to sleep on the couch and three worried brothers.

These memories confused him, flashes pieces of his life all scrambled up in a bowl of colors and images.

**Lies, all lies.**

And those three voices that brought discomfort when they appeared, where they real? Did they existent? Or are they just something his mind made up?

**No we are real those turtles lied.**

And if his mind made them up then that meant he hadn't lost it at all. Blue eyes stared at the angry ghosts that stood before and around him, but this time he wasn't scared.

**No get away from them!**

And when they reached their hand down to towards him he didn't flinch or cringe.

**No run!**

**Don't just lay there!**

Nor did he whimper when those cool hands touched him.

**No Stop!**

**Let them help.**

That voice, that one voice that didn't scare him, that didn't bring a discomforting presence. He knew that voice, remembers it.

**Let them help you.**

**Quiet!**

**They'll help you.**

**Stop it!**

**Trust them.**

**SHUT UP!**

**Trust me.**

Blue eyes closed as he let them take him.

*******************

For four days they were use to the sound of tears echoing through the lair late at night, it was the fifth night and everything was quiet. Raph glared at the TV as though the device had insulted him, his eyes kept flickering to the second floor. Finally with a growl of frustration he got up and skillfully scaled the wall to the second floor, he then headed to his room where he met Leo standing outside the door looking unsure.

The elder looked at his brother "You worried too?" the blue wearing turtle asked Raph nodded, "Yea" Leo gave him a soft smile before knocking on the door "Mikey" he called both him and Raph listened for the soft whimper that usual came when they came to check to him lately, but there was no whimper. Leo listened closely and he grew worried when he didn't here a sound.

Raph who also notice the silence to became worried "Mikey?" he called when he got nothing, he banged on the door "Mikey!" with a anger and frustrated growl he kicked the door down, Leo gave him a disapproving look Raph ignored him as he entered. The sight of his baby brother curled up on the floor not moving caused Raph's heart to stop and his blood to run cold, "Mikey!" Leo rushed pass him and to the figure on the floor, relief fell over him when he saw that his brother was breathing. Blue empty eyes stared unblinkingly at the wall across from him unresponsive to the turtle's calls, it was enough to alarm Leo "DONNIE!".

_He crawled out of the pile that was his brothers, eyes blurred with tears. His little feet made their way over to the large rat that was asleep not far from the bed in which he and his brothers slept in. Timidly he patted his father's arm, the rat open one eye and looked at his youngest child, he took one look at the frighten teary eyes and sat up. No words were needed as the large rat open his arms and the toddler turtle crawled into them, Splinter smiled as he drew little circles on the little one's shell. Blue eyes slowly dozed off a smile on his lips, safe in his daddy's arms._

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_7 year old Donnie entered the room to see his little bother sitting on the bed, pouting. "What's wrong Mikey?" he asked Mikey looked at him, "Raphie broke my truck" Donnie finally notices the broken truck next to his brother the wheels were off. Donnie took the truck and examined it, before popping all four wheels in their place "Here you go" he said handing his brother the truck. Mikey wide eyed with amazement took the truck, he rolled one of the wheels his face split into huge grin and gave his brother a bone crushing hug "Thanks Donnie!"_

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_It was the first night in a new home and he couldn't sleep, noises were everywhere making him jump. He slipped off the top of the bunk bed Mr. Bear in his arms and woke his brother who slept on the bottom bunk, "Raphie I can't sleep" he said waking his brother, the twelve year old glared at his brother who had awoken him "Go bother Leo and Don" he said before turning his head away. "But-" "No" the older turtle said sternly, a whimper made him turn his head back to his brother, large begging blue eyes and pouty lips stared at him. "Please" Mikey begged " I promise I'll be real quiet" Raph sighed as he caved at the sight of the infamous puppy dog pout, " Fine" he said and made room for his little brother, Mikey smiled and quickly crawled in the bed, cuddling with his brother. "Night Raphie" "Night"_

***********************

_Both turtles jumped at the loud bang that boomed through the dark tunnels, "Leo are you sure this is the right way?" his elder brother wasn't sure, but he didn't want his little brother to get scared, " Yea Mike, home is just a little further" the fourteen year wasn't sure and tighten his hold on his big brother's arm. "Don't worry Mike. I won't let nothing bad happen to you" Leo said giving him a reassuring smile, Mikey smiled back trusting his brother._

** ********************

_Mikey loved Christmas, the food, presents, the tree, and carols, but what Mikey loved most of all was on Christmas night after everything had died down and hot chocolate had been drunken, he brothers would cuddle up together -Raph with much reluctant and complaints- to warm each other from the cold, to be together. _

** **********************

Warm, that's the first thing he notice when he finally came to his senses. Mikey blinked and stared up at the ceiling, for minutes though it felt like hours he stayed there. When he tried to move he couldn't, he looked down at the emerald green arm around his waist keeping him in place, he looked over his shoulder to meet the face of his hot-headed brother sleeping against him.

"Raphie" he thought he then notice two more bodies, he looked at the other sleeping turtle on his right who ''s arm also was around his waist just like Raph's, held on tight to make sure he never left "Leo". On his lap was the third sleeping turtle he too held tightly to him "Donnie".

He stayed there staring at him sleeping brothers for a moment before trying to wriggle out the death grips they called embraces, the action caused the turtles to awake. They blinked sleepy eyes at him before relief dawned on their faces, "Mikey!" said turtle just blinked at them "How do you feel?" Don asked not realizing he was lying on his brother, "Moring Donnie", Mikey then said cheerfully, they stared. "Mikey you-"and then he smiled. He smiled, not that empty and insane smile, but a smile a real smile. A smile that was purely Michelangelo.

Mikey squeaked as he was pulled into a bone crushing hug by Raph, the emerald turtle buried his face in Mikey's shoulder, no one said anything as tear wet sea-green shoulders and soft sobs were heard and embraces were given.

**************

After everyone had calmed down Don made lunch for everyone and brought it back to the lab, Mikey didn't eat right away instead asked then asked a question "How did he die?" the three froze. Finally Leo spoke "As you know father was old, and after you were taken I guess his heart couldn't take it any longer and he was gone" "So it was my fault" Mikey said "No it wasn't " Raph said "Sensei was old, and we knew it was gonna happen sooner or later it just happen at a bad time".

Mikey nodded but didn't say anything just stared down at his food, "I'm sorry" he then said softly. "You have nothing to be sorry for Mikey" Don said. Mikey didn't believe him, everything was his fault and there was no one or nothing that could change that.

"Please don't look like that" blue eyes blinked and looked at his brothers who both wore an angry and sadden expression, he then focused on Don who spoke, "It's not you're fault Mikey, nothing that has happen is your fault" he said. "I'm sorry" Mikey said again before he began eating, the three looked at their brother then each other, Michelangelo was not healed they knew that, but he was going to help him, after all that what family does, that's brothers do.

**End **

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**There you go the end of the story, I may do the sequl. **

**Reveiw Plzz! **

**Bye-bye ^^! **


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